Shipoopi
by Aeli Kindara
Summary: How will Lily react when James finally explains the look of barely withheld mirth that was on his face after their first kiss? If I were James, I'd prepare to duck.


**Disclaimer:** James and Lily belong to J. K. Rowling. "Shipoopi" belongs to Meredith Willson.

* * *

"You remember our first date, Lily?"

"Yeah."

"How I wanted to kiss you but you wouldn't let me."

"I remember the expression on your face. Completely _bemused_ that a girl would go on a date with you and not want to kiss you. It was pretty darn funny."

"I'm sure it was, to you."

"Oh, don't be like that. Here, I'll kiss you now to make up for it."

"And another one for when you wouldn't kiss me on the second date?"

"All right."

…

"That better?"

"Much."

"Good."

"And d'you remember the third date?"

"When I finally consented to kiss you, yes. And how afterward, you had this expression on your face like you were trying to hold in laughter, and asked you what was wrong —"

"— rather sharply, if I recall correctly."

"Mmhm. But you wouldn't tell me. And you still haven't."

"I don't know if I should — I might get a dose of the infamous Lily Evans temper —"

"You're saying you won't if you don't?"

"Good point. Well, see, when I was — ten, I think — my parents and I went on a trip to America. They took me to see this Muggle musical in New York City, at some place called Broadway. Seemed to think it was a good experience to broaden my cultural horizons, or something like that."

"And?"

"Well, I don't remember much of the musical — I think it was called _The Music Man_ — but there was this one song that I remember just because of the sheer ridiculousness. Let me see if I can remember the words — um — something like — and don't expect me to get this right —

"_The woman who'll kiss on the very first date  
Is usually a hussy  
And the woman who'll kiss on the — _um —_ second time out  
Is anything but fussy  
But the woman who — waits — 'til the — third time out — _no —_ third time around_  
Something about her head — _feet on the ground  
She's the girl he's glad he's found  
She's his Shipoopi._

"And then it goes on to say something about how a Shipoopi is the girl that's hard to get —"

"James Potter, are you calling me a — _Shipoopi!"_

"I _said_ it was ridiculous."

"I don't know if I'm going to forgive you for this one."

"I didn't make up the song!"

"Hmph."

"Although I have to say, you've got to be the epitome of a girl that's hard to get —"

"_James!"_

"Well, you have to admit that four years of —"

"_Shipoopi?"_

"Look, Lils, I'm sorry! But you did ask!"

"Hmph."

"Stop scowling. Your face will get stuck that way."

"Hmph."

"That's getting a little old."

…

"Look, if you don't cheer up, I'm going to have to tickle you."

"James!"

"You asked for it —"

"Hey! Stop!"

"Not mad at me anymore?"

"Fine!"

"Tsk, tsk. That didn't sound exactly pleasant."

"James!"

"Lily!"

"Stop it."

"I will if you will."

"Fine, fathead."

"Be that way, Shipoopi."

"I'm going to _get_ you for that one!"

"Whoa! Hey! That _hurt_, you know!"

"Serves you right."

"Shipoopi."

"One would think you have masochistic tendencies, from the way you behave."

"Or maybe I just like it when you launch yourself at me — ow!"

"Do you really want to continue that sentence, Potter?"

"I'm thinking… not?"

"_Much _better."

"You're such a controlling girlfriend, Lils."

"I'm your fiancée now."

"But controlling fiancée sounds weird."

"And Shipoopi doesn't?"

"How about I just don't say anything in response to that?"

"Too late."

"Oh yeah. Oops."

"Poor James. Sometimes I wonder if you were dropped on your head as a —"

"Hey!"

"You asked for it."

"When?"

"Um, let's see, well, first when you —"

"You can stop now."

"Before starting?"

"Yes. It's much easier to stop you before you build up momentum."

"But what about when I start to get tired?"

"I suppose we might have a parabola thing going… but it takes a long time for you to start getting tired. It's much easier to just cut you off at the beginning."

"Have you conducted a scientific study of this, or something?"

"Well, I've got nearly eight years' worth of data."

"And you've written it all down, I suppose."

"Shipoopi."

"…and the relevance of that was…?"

"Who said it had to be relevant?"

"No one, I guess. Sometimes I think that's the beauty of life. Nothing is relevant."

"Um — Lils?"

"Yeah?"

"I just called you Shipoopi. Aren't you supposed to be slaughtering me, not spouting philosophy?"

"Oh, you want me to slaughter you? I'll be quite happy to comply."

"No, actually, that's all right."

"I'm in an irrelevant mood."

"That's… wonderful."

"Independent probabilities."

"Uh, yeah…"

"You have no idea what I'm talking about, do you?"

"Nope."

"Good. Neither do I."

"Shipoopi."

* * *

**A/N:** Some mindless James/Lily. Sorry if the ending is abrupt; I'm not good with conclusions. I'm in the pit orchestra for my high school's production of "The Music Man" and I was struck by the idea of Lily's reaction to being called a Shipoopi. This was intended to be a drabble… heh… but it didn't end up that way, as you can probably see. Please review and make me a very happy person! How about I evoke sympathy in you by telling you about how I'm sick for the third time in two weeks and the fourth time in a month and my parents think I might have mono, therefore making you want to make me feel better by reviewing? Shameless, I know. But it is true — about being sick, I mean. Anyway. Just review. Please?


End file.
